Thoughts on 'Thoughts and Prayers'
When the truckload of crap hits my windmill, don’t send your Thoughts and Prayers, fling me booze and choc coated peanuts...
Friends, I’m not here to belittle whatever brand of religion you belong too, I’ll leave that to the experts.
But, as an apathetic agnostic (I don’t know, and I don’t care) I think it’s time we come up with another phrase to unintentionally insult console our hurting family or friends with.
Because, of all the meaningless, trite, little phrases that get trotted out when life has gone mango shaped, ‘Sending you thoughts and prayers’ must be up there with, ‘God does not give us more than we can handle.’
Great. That’s great.
Does anyone else find it ironic that people are praying for help from the very being that gave them the problem in the first place?
Does that sound like abuse to you?
It sounds like abuse to me…
Still, to be fair, it’s not as bad as saying any of the following:
· Sending you positive vibes. (The new-age version of Thought and Prayers… and just as vomit inducing.)
· Tough Break!
· Good luck!
· There’s plenty of fish in the sea!
· Whoa! Has it occurred to you that you might be bad luck’ to be around?
· I’m glad that didn’t happen to me!
· How on earth do you survive this?!
· You seem to be crying a lot. Surely it’s not that bad?
· Honestly, what’s getting you out of bed every morning?
· Will there be hot food at the funeral? Free beer?
· Yeah, I’m really sorry for your loss. Hey, has anyone seen my putter?
NOTE: I have actually heard people (ok, one of them was me) say these things, then genuinely wondered why the sad people suddenly blew up in their faces.
But, if Thoughts and Prayers were rubber ducks, the Pacific Ocean would be buried three feet deep underneath them, for about thirty seconds a day.
Because, all too quickly, we bob off to the next ‘thing’ demanding our attention and energy.
That’s why I’m a firm believer in DOING SOMETHING.
Anything! (Well, nearly anything).
Make a call. Send a card, a private message, a bottle of a favourite drink, a bunch of flowers, or do their shopping, wash their car, mop their floor, cook a meal… or six.
Look, it may be just sitting nearby while your friends’ heart falls out of their chest and flubbles across the floor picking up dust, dirt and debris along the way.
Or, my personal favourite, a genuinely kind hug, filled with warmth and compassion.
Get creative, they’re your family or friends, you’ll know the best way to show them you care in your own, unique, way.
Your act, however small or extravagant, truly shows that you are, and have, genuinely thought of them and gone to a little trouble to acknowledge their pain.
It’s called being human, but it takes practice. Keep trying.
By the way, if things in my life get so out of hand that booze and choc coated peanuts won’t cut it, then send…